I’m watching James Corden (Cordon?) for the first time, and wouldn’t you know it, during his monologue he doaes a joke about..

“Bob, you have three weeks to live”

Well, that’s a bit of a bummer. I don’t know whether to spend my time focused on living or maybe just turn off The Late, Late Show… screw the karaoke.

It’s been a bad day for a lot of people. I know that ACA, popularly referred to as ‘Obamacare’, is flawed, but today, rather than fixing it, the GOP-controlled House of Representatives have passed a piece of shit bill that might strip away insurance from as many as 24 million people.

There are times that I think there is Jesus, and then there’s Republican Jesus.

Check this. Under the new bill, rape might be considered an existing condition.

I can hear the testimony in court now, “She wanted that pre-existing condition. Just consider the way she was dressed.”

Two other things to consider, This provides almost 900 billion dollars in tax relief for the wealthiest people in the country. Makes you wonder if we actually are assigning a value on some human lives here. “Sorry, we can’t give you a new kidney, somebody had to redecorate their fourth house in Jackson Hole.”
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“Sorry, we can’t give you a new kidney, somebody had to redecorate their fourth house in Jackson Hole.”

Kids love hearing that.

And they will.

Maybe not from their grandparents, though. Cuts to Medicare might send grampa and gramma off to than earlier expectations.

Hmmm. So that’s how the GOP plans to cut back on Social Security expenditures.

Peace, y’all.

Every now and then you have one of those days that just beats you down and keeps on beating. Today, it was primarily my own choice, but the combination of deadlines has hit me a little bit.

I’ve got a refresher certification exam lined up tomorrow. By all rights, I ought to pop this out the first time I take it, but I’ve been bitten in the ass before.  Seems like a regular event that I dive into my study materials, and I think I have a grasp on things, I think I’m making progress, and then the exam rears it’s ugly head and puts me in my place, fragments of my ego trailing behind me like drops of blood leading away from the scene of the crime.

I know. I ought to be more positive. My ache is compounded by the joy of trash day. Our local public works folks come through on Thursday, and I placed a special order to have our larger items removed as well. Making the phone call is the easy part. Moving the chunks of lumber, old basketball goals, an old smoker and a few other things to the front of the house was the achy part. And let me tell you, I’m feeling it now.

This whole growing old business… ugh. I miss being 19.

Time to choke down a couple of ibuprofen and hit the sack after I go back through a few more notes.

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Whose brilliant idea was it to take a cert exam tomorrow morning at 9:00 an hour away from the house?

Yup. It was me.

Does anybody want to volunteer as a scapegoat?

Peace, y’all

Tuesdays are supposed to be the most productive day of the week.

Ummm…

OK, I probably ought to give myself a little more credit. I got some stuff done. I planned meals for a few days, and acquired the ingredients…

Now, y’all might not know this, but I enjoy cooking. And tomorrow, I get to whip up a batch of my chili. Now, my wife makes a great traditional chile. I go someplace else with my chili. My wife uses ground beef, and I get to use smoked pork loin. She goes red, I go green. Hers gets a little cheese. Mine gets a dollop of sour cream – and it needs it,  I use a green chili salsa to liven mine up a little bit, but it might have a little too much of the vinegar taste to it at times, so the sour cream does a decent job evening out the flavor notes.

Kind of funny. An old friend/fraternity brother of mine wrote a brief lamentation about going into an Indian restaurant, and asking his server to bring it to him “spicy”.

Now, I got to tell you this. Unless you know what the hell you are doing, you do not … let me repeat this…

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YOU DO NOT!!!!! go into an Indian, Thai, or Hunan restaurant and order SPICY!

Another word I would recommend you avoid is “Traditional”.

Jack, I’m telling you… those folks live for that shit. They know they have you now… because you ordered this in front of friends, and if you’re a man, you have to own this shit now. You are going to sit there and live through excruciating pain… but let me tell you, brother, the pain you are dealing with now is nothing to what you are going to deal with in another 4-8 hours, depending on the efficiency of your gastrointestinal tract. You thought you were on a puddle-jumper to Houston. Nuh-uh. You are now officially on the red-eye.

Find a Ben & Jerry’s buffet… and C’mon Ice Cream!

Peace, y’all!

One thing that I don’t like about my career is the constant demanding maintenance of my certifications.

And it’s going to get worse before it gets better.

So, to clarify, I’m an MCT, which stands for Microsoft Certified Trainer. I’ve been continuously certified and delivering Microsoft content for 22 years as of this August. The real number is even longer if you go back to teaching day long seminars on how to optimize your experience running Windows 3.1 and Windows for Workgroups 3.11.

For on-premises deployment, people will typically deploy a Windows Server solution with services like email, database, management, and other services. For the last twenty plus years. Microsoft has updated those package every 3-5 years. For a certified trainer, that means we have a three to five year cycle to keep our certs up to date.

Now I’m certified in Office 365 and Windows Azure.

Certification in those areas requires a little more frequent certification cycle. Annual renewal.

Ugh.
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I’m not getting any younger.

A student of mine had a wonderful analogy regarding trying to learn new things. She said her iceberg could only hold so may penguins. As something knew needed a permanent location on the iceberg, a few penguins got booted off… no more room.

Time for me to start throwing some elbows on the iceberg.

I just hope I don’t end up like Johnny Mnemonic and have to sacrifice my childhood memories for an extra terabyte of data.

Peace, y’all

It’s the last day of April 2017, here in the middle of the country.  A rainy Sunday, following a very rainy Friday and Saturday. Looks like there have been some fatal tornado touchdowns in East Texas. Gotta offer up a prayer for those that have suffered the loss of family, friends, and property at times like this.

Around here there has been some flooding, although nothing really in my quarter. Apparently, it has been worse in other parts of Kansas, and friends in Colorado have had to deal with a mid-spring snow of all things.

Kansas has been hit a little hard this year, with the prairie fires, followed by the recent rains and flooding. But, hey, other places have had it worse, and will likely have even greater difficulties in the coming years due to the unpredictable nature of our climate issues.

(OK, I believe in the 97%, not the 3%, when it comes to global climate change)

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On the habit building – I think I’m doing OK. I’ve been pretty consistent about stopping myself from going to bed at night until I know I’ve written my blog entry for the day. I’m considering some other habits I should develop, and how I might make them part of my daily routine. One I should definitely get back to is the pursuit of 10,000 steps per day logged to my pedometer.

BTW, if you haven’t checked out the new MST3K on Netflix…. do it.

Peace, y’all

Teenage boys.

Sometimes as a father I just want to … aargh.

I had a little something planned for my son. He’s been bugging me for years, quite literally, to get him a new smart phone. He’s always been a little behind the curve when it comes to the swapping and upgrading of new phones in our house, so I thought today would be a good time for me to take him and his old Samsung Galaxy Note 4 over to the Sprint store and get him upgraded to a Galaxy S8. I subtly hinted that this was phone related, and I asked him to run upstairs, change out of his sleeping clothes, then we’d get out of the house for awhile.

That’s where the “loop” begins.

My son gets caught in loops. Something about his way of thinking doesn’t include an escape clause to get him out of his room after he’s changed his clothes…

Check that… he may have never changed his clothes. For all I know he’s still in his pj’s, laying in bed, looking at his phone, likely complaining about his phone, while I sit down here just stewing a bit.

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There’s a part of me that just wants to head out for a bit, not tell him where I’m going, then wait for my wife to ask him, “I thought you were going with your dad to get a new phone?”.

Maybe that will allow the AI to kick-in and add an escape clause to the loop.

And we’ll find out…

Peace, y’all.

(Addendum: Just as I was about to hit publish, my wife peaked out of her office and yelled at the boy… time to go phone shopping)

I came across an article earlier this week that reminded me of another story I had come across last fall or last summer.

Listening to this song can reduce your anxiety by up to 65%.

I was curious. I had heard a snippet of this song the first time I had come across it, “Weightless” by Marconi Union.  I decided to have a little experiment to see how well it soothed this old savage breast.

I decide to open up my Pandora One app, and I created a new station based on this song. I have a prep week this week, so long about 4:30, it wasn’t such a bad time to put on some cans and check out the relaxing powers of my new station.

KTFO’d.

I wouldn’t have been out harder if Mike Tyson had punched my button at the height of his career.

2 hours I was out. I mean, I get a half-hour nap, maybe even 45 minutes to an hour.

When I woke up, my son informed me he was worried, but he saw my chest going up and down. Then I noticed my wife and son just kind of looking at me.

I had know idea what was up. They started giggling.
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It took me twenty minutes to notice.

Apparently, while I was out, my daughter, Gracie, had come by the house and came across sleeping beauty.

And decided to do my toenails.

I lovely burgundy.

I might add the picture later, but yeah. Daddy got a pedi.

Thank goodness for socks.

Peace, y’all.

I don’t think I talk to myself too much.

I catch myself saying some things from time to time, the mutterings one makes while reading an unfortunate email or some other sort of passage that causes one to wonder about the author’s education.

I catch myself talking to other cars and their drivers while I’m out and about traveling from point a to point b. Sometimes the remarks I mark are … less than considerate.

I’ve read some motivational books and listen to some self-help tapes that describe positive self-talk, a form of self-hypnosis. I should probably review that stuff. More of my conversations would be. “What are doing, Bob? Idiot!”.

I probably shouldn’t talk to myself, though… especially the two-part conversations that cause casual observers to really, really hope the person having the two-part conversation is wearing a Bluetooth headset in the ear they can’t see.

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I always thought it would be a good idea to give crazy people a Bluetooth headset, though… might make them appear to be a little less troubled, don’t you think.

Or we might look at everybody talking into a Bluetooth headset as being a little bit nuts.

And I just found out that Bluetooth is supposed to be capitalized when used to describe a headset. Good to know!

Peace, y’all

Years ago, my brother, Dan, was stationed at Scholfield Barracks on Oahu while he was in the Army. One of the things he found frustrating about life in paradise was the size of the island. It was a bit frustrating to him that when he wanted to just relax and ease his mind, getting out for a long drive on the highway wasn’t really an option.

A number of years later, my wife and I went to Honolulu for a conference she was obligated to attend (yeah, poor me!). It wasn’t until I drove around the island that I understood my brothers perspective. There’s something calming about just being able to get out on a four-lane divided highway, rap her up to about 75 MPH, and just engaging the cruise control.

That said… I’d guess the Hawaiian analog of just getting out on the water and floating would be just as, if not more, calming.

I share that gene with my brother, and I think we both got it from our dad.

Is that a weird way to start a blog about getting new tires on the ride?
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Had to get new wheels. Ruby (my red Ford Flex) was getting a bit worn on the tread, so I get her four new tires… and it is so nice to get back to a smooth ride. She was hitting a bit of a wobble at times, and it was due to uneven tire wear. Now that I’m getting tires at the same place I get my regular service done, I think it will be easier to monitor my tire rotations and wear.

I hope y’all have a smooth ride as well.

Peace, y’all.

Something tells me that this particular blog post is going to be a weird jumble of random thought.

More people need to watch “Forged in Fire” on the History Channel. It’s pretty cool watching these folks create Damascus steel, then draw it out into a real usable blade. I really admire that skill set, and the patterns that show up in the steel is fantastic.

My favorite label in forever on a beer bottle is Free State’s “Stormchaser”. The label features what could be a brownish pickup from the 50’s. My first set of wheels was a 1955 Ford Pickup. My dad painted it Candy Root Beer – brown with a gold metallic flake. Factory mags. Dual Cherry Bombs. 302 V-8. You know how they say that you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone? That’s the way I feel about that pickup. She was beautiful.

I found out I like Elder Scrolls Online. I might have to go back and explore the options in Skyrim now. I never really got into Skyrim that much, but that was more of an issue with my time and priorities than the game. I’ll have to check it out with a better mindset moving forward.

BTW, I don’t want to pay for Trump’s Wall, either. Does that make me qualified to run for President of Mexico?

I need to rethink my PEMDAS order of operations. I made a math mistake.
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It wasn’t guacamole.

Time for a little “Forged in Fire”.

Peace, y’all.