Teenage boys.

Sometimes as a father I just want to … aargh.

I had a little something planned for my son. He’s been bugging me for years, quite literally, to get him a new smart phone. He’s always been a little behind the curve when it comes to the swapping and upgrading of new phones in our house, so I thought today would be a good time for me to take him and his old Samsung Galaxy Note 4 over to the Sprint store and get him upgraded to a Galaxy S8. I subtly hinted that this was phone related, and I asked him to run upstairs, change out of his sleeping clothes, then we’d get out of the house for awhile.

That’s where the “loop” begins.

My son gets caught in loops. Something about his way of thinking doesn’t include an escape clause to get him out of his room after he’s changed his clothes…

Check that… he may have never changed his clothes. For all I know he’s still in his pj’s, laying in bed, looking at his phone, likely complaining about his phone, while I sit down here just stewing a bit.

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There’s a part of me that just wants to head out for a bit, not tell him where I’m going, then wait for my wife to ask him, “I thought you were going with your dad to get a new phone?”.

Maybe that will allow the AI to kick-in and add an escape clause to the loop.

And we’ll find out…

Peace, y’all.

(Addendum: Just as I was about to hit publish, my wife peaked out of her office and yelled at the boy… time to go phone shopping)

I came across an article earlier this week that reminded me of another story I had come across last fall or last summer.

Listening to this song can reduce your anxiety by up to 65%.

I was curious. I had heard a snippet of this song the first time I had come across it, “Weightless” by Marconi Union.  I decided to have a little experiment to see how well it soothed this old savage breast.

I decide to open up my Pandora One app, and I created a new station based on this song. I have a prep week this week, so long about 4:30, it wasn’t such a bad time to put on some cans and check out the relaxing powers of my new station.

KTFO’d.

I wouldn’t have been out harder if Mike Tyson had punched my button at the height of his career.

2 hours I was out. I mean, I get a half-hour nap, maybe even 45 minutes to an hour.

When I woke up, my son informed me he was worried, but he saw my chest going up and down. Then I noticed my wife and son just kind of looking at me.

I had know idea what was up. They started giggling.
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It took me twenty minutes to notice.

Apparently, while I was out, my daughter, Gracie, had come by the house and came across sleeping beauty.

And decided to do my toenails.

I lovely burgundy.

I might add the picture later, but yeah. Daddy got a pedi.

Thank goodness for socks.

Peace, y’all.

I don’t think I talk to myself too much.

I catch myself saying some things from time to time, the mutterings one makes while reading an unfortunate email or some other sort of passage that causes one to wonder about the author’s education.

I catch myself talking to other cars and their drivers while I’m out and about traveling from point a to point b. Sometimes the remarks I mark are … less than considerate.

I’ve read some motivational books and listen to some self-help tapes that describe positive self-talk, a form of self-hypnosis. I should probably review that stuff. More of my conversations would be. “What are doing, Bob? Idiot!”.

I probably shouldn’t talk to myself, though… especially the two-part conversations that cause casual observers to really, really hope the person having the two-part conversation is wearing a Bluetooth headset in the ear they can’t see.

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I always thought it would be a good idea to give crazy people a Bluetooth headset, though… might make them appear to be a little less troubled, don’t you think.

Or we might look at everybody talking into a Bluetooth headset as being a little bit nuts.

And I just found out that Bluetooth is supposed to be capitalized when used to describe a headset. Good to know!

Peace, y’all

Years ago, my brother, Dan, was stationed at Scholfield Barracks on Oahu while he was in the Army. One of the things he found frustrating about life in paradise was the size of the island. It was a bit frustrating to him that when he wanted to just relax and ease his mind, getting out for a long drive on the highway wasn’t really an option.

A number of years later, my wife and I went to Honolulu for a conference she was obligated to attend (yeah, poor me!). It wasn’t until I drove around the island that I understood my brothers perspective. There’s something calming about just being able to get out on a four-lane divided highway, rap her up to about 75 MPH, and just engaging the cruise control.

That said… I’d guess the Hawaiian analog of just getting out on the water and floating would be just as, if not more, calming.

I share that gene with my brother, and I think we both got it from our dad.

Is that a weird way to start a blog about getting new tires on the ride?
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Had to get new wheels. Ruby (my red Ford Flex) was getting a bit worn on the tread, so I get her four new tires… and it is so nice to get back to a smooth ride. She was hitting a bit of a wobble at times, and it was due to uneven tire wear. Now that I’m getting tires at the same place I get my regular service done, I think it will be easier to monitor my tire rotations and wear.

I hope y’all have a smooth ride as well.

Peace, y’all.

Something tells me that this particular blog post is going to be a weird jumble of random thought.

More people need to watch “Forged in Fire” on the History Channel. It’s pretty cool watching these folks create Damascus steel, then draw it out into a real usable blade. I really admire that skill set, and the patterns that show up in the steel is fantastic.

My favorite label in forever on a beer bottle is Free State’s “Stormchaser”. The label features what could be a brownish pickup from the 50’s. My first set of wheels was a 1955 Ford Pickup. My dad painted it Candy Root Beer – brown with a gold metallic flake. Factory mags. Dual Cherry Bombs. 302 V-8. You know how they say that you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone? That’s the way I feel about that pickup. She was beautiful.

I found out I like Elder Scrolls Online. I might have to go back and explore the options in Skyrim now. I never really got into Skyrim that much, but that was more of an issue with my time and priorities than the game. I’ll have to check it out with a better mindset moving forward.

BTW, I don’t want to pay for Trump’s Wall, either. Does that make me qualified to run for President of Mexico?

I need to rethink my PEMDAS order of operations. I made a math mistake.
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It wasn’t guacamole.

Time for a little “Forged in Fire”.

Peace, y’all.

“A most notable coward, an infinite and endless liar, an hourly promise breaker, the owner of no one good quality.” – Shakespeare

My insult game is a work in progress. I’m trying to up my game.

I spend some time on social media, and you see certain conversations that break down into some pretty cliche insults.

Not a lot of creativity there.

But William Shakespeare. That guy knew how to insult people. “May

I read a quote from a pop-culture figure and my response was that he had all of the intellectual prowess of a lobotomized kumquat.

I like kumquats.

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I was always a fan of the more creative jibes, though. “May the Bird of Paradise fly up your nose!”

“May the Bird of Paradise fly up your nose!”

“May your left armpit become infested with the fleas of a thousand camels”

I’m rounding out one involving infected ingrown hairs, unreachable places, and inappropriate locales. It’s not quite ready for it’s debut quite yet. Might never be… it’s gotta have that rhythm to it, that roll right off the tongue quality.

If you’re in an insult slump, you could start here.  It’s a random generator that pulls up Shakespearean insults.
There’s also a more generic random generator that you could use as a foundation for better insults. And smile when you say that.

Peace, y’all.

I’m smellin’ pretty smokey right now.

As anyone with a reasonable knowledge of search engines can ascertain, I am a resident of Lawrence, Kansas. Part of the midwestern culture is the smoking of meats. I’ve embraced that aspect of our culture, and I like to apply a rub to a piece of meat, and smoke that sucker until the core temperature ensures the safety of the product.

Today I took an entire pork loin, cut it into three equally sized pieces, and put them in little bread tins. With oe, I added some sweet, southern marinade and some mandarin oranges to apply a citrus note to the recipe. I think citrus is a very nice flavor to pork, kind of like that pineapple and Canadian bacon flavor people (outside of Iceland) like on their pizza.

The other two chunks of pork loin I rubbed down with a standard commercial rub, then dropped into the bread tins.

There’s beef on the smoker today, as well. I took an entire brisket, cut it down into a flat and the point, then applied a comprehensive rub. Wrapped up those two hefty chunks in foil.

I use Kingsford charcoal as a starter, then add in either pecan or hickory as my chunk hardwood. Let it sit until the center temp reaches 165 – 175 degrees Fahrenheit.
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My family is very pleased with me tonight. And they are full as well.

Nothing else really to go over and add tonight.

Hope y’all have a nice week.

Peace, y’all.

For one reason or another, I’m kind of phoning it in tonight, but I’m trying to live up to the pledge I made.

If I don’t stick to it and make it a good habit, I’m letting myself down. I know that the first time I skip, it will just make it easier and easier to skip, and next thing you know I’ve screwed it up.

I’m not ready to give it up quite yet.

I’m not tremendously motivated tonight. I’m a wee bit pissed off at some of that cosmic bird flipping that has been directed at me for one reason or another.

Maybe I need to polish my karma up a little bit.

I decided to drive a little bit after my daughter’s scholarship group recognition dinner. First thing, I get pinged and sent twenty minutes outside of town for a pickup. Went to an inconclusive address, no rider, and next thing you know, I get the popup letting me know that the ride has been canceled.

Oh, man.
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Twenty minutes out. ten minutes looking around for a rider. A grumpy twenty minute ride back.

I’m pretty much over it, but it did hack me off at the time.

Oh well. It’s over and done with.  Get over it, Bob.

Time to get some shuteye.

Peace, y’all.

Again, Dangerous Visions.

I almost screwed up, but fortunately, I found myself thinking about my day, and my habit came bubbling to the top. I’ve made a commitment to write 200 words per day, and here I am.

I’m actually feeling pretty positive at the moment (except for the cut in my right index finger… this hurts and it kind of sucks after two days).

The fact that I remembered to write my 200 words, and that I made the choice to persist in my support and pledge to the #WriteChain gives me pause… I reacted to that little piece of awareness in a positive way and went straight for my notebook to write my words and post my daily update.

The fact that I’m constantly looking at the bottom of the page to monitor my word count is probably a negative.

Some days the words flow better than other days. No one is going to argue that point, especially a wannabe writer.

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Today has been a rather interesting day, I must admit.

It is amazing how many people will try to fit into an automobile when they are trying to save a little money on Uber, right?

Hey, at least they were getting a ride. I’d hate to see any of these young people get hurt by making a bad driving choice.

So, I’m there. And what I’ve written is about as eloquent as romantic prose from a lobotomized kumquat.

Peace, y’all

According to the ol’ calendar on the wall, today is April 20th.

In certain parts of the United States, that means today is 4/20.

The origins of the term 420 and its association with cannabis advocates is easily researched, and here’s a bit from about that:

“In 1971, Steve Capper, Dave Reddix, Jeffrey Noel, Larry Schwartz, and Mark Gravich five high school students^[2] in San Rafael, California,^[3][4] calling themselves the Waldos^[5][6] because “their chosen hang-out spot was a wall outside the school”,^[7] used the term in connection with a fall 1971 plan to search for an abandoned cannabis crop that they had learned about,^[5][8] based on a treasure map made by the grower.^[9] The Waldos designated the Louis Pasteur statue on the grounds of San Rafael High School as their meeting place, and 4:20 p.m. as their meeting time.^[7] The Waldos referred to this plan with the phrase “4:20 Louis”. Several failed attempts to find the crop eventually shortened their phrase to simply “4:20”, which ultimately evolved into a codeword that the teens used to mean marijuana-smoking in general.^[8]

So, where do I stand?

I’m not a proponent of its use for recreational purposes, just like I’m not going to tell somebody to go out and throw back a few drinks and get behind the wheel of a car. I am, however, fine with the idea of medical marijuana for a couple of reasons. First of all, there are people out there that are hurting due to one malady or another, and there seems to be mounting evidence that some properties of marijuana can help some people that are dealing with epilepsy, Parkinson’s Disease, arthritis, glaucoma, and other health issues, not to mention my brothers and sisters fighting the fight against cancer, and are suffering some negative side effects from chemotherapy and radiation treatments.

The other health issue that floats to the top is that of our veterans that are suffering from PTSD. Hey, if the consumption of marijuana helps folks out and takes the edge off to a point where they can deal with the world a little easier, then why not?

Yeah, people smoke it, and it damages lung tissue and has some other negative effects on the human body. So does alcohol, and that is legal.
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I think there are a lot of people in jail due to marijuana and marijuana-related convictions. My take on that is pretty straight forward – I would rather live next to a pot smoker, than live next to a family left broken by the arrest of a pot smoker.

And don’t even get me started on hemp and all of the positive things that can come from that little plant.

That is a rant for another day.

For all those planning on firing up at 4:20 this afternoon, please stay safe, and have a designated driver get you to your destination. I might even be hanging out my Uber shingle about that time to get folks delivered and poured onto their front porch.

(No “tips” today, please!)

Peace, y’all.